Review – Lobby Java by Forrest

Review – Lobby Java by Forrest


THE BUZZ SPREAD QUICKER
THAN THE SMILE ACROSS MY FACE WHEN I ARRIVED TO WORK
EACH MORNING. HOW MANY CAPPUCCINOS
CAN I GET FOR YOU? – JUST THE ONE, PLEASE.
– [laughs] OKAY. $3.50.
THANK YOU. THERE WERE NO TWO WAYS
ABOUT IT–I LOVED MY JOB, TO THE POINT
WHERE I BEGAN TO FORGET THAT IT WASN’T MY REAL JOB. [knocks on counter]
– EXCUSE ME. – OH, WE’RE NOT OPEN YET, SIR–
OH, GRANT. HI.
– HEY. DO YOU HAVE A SECOND TO TALK? – UH…
– JUST FOR A SEC? – YES.
– YEAH. – HOW’S THE SHOW GOING?
– WELL… WHAT DO YOU MEAN BY THAT? ‘CAUSE WE’RE WAITING FOR YOU
TO QUIT THIS JOB. – OH, YEAH. QUIT THIS JOB? – THAT’S WHY YOU TOOK THIS JOB
IN THE FIRST PLACE. – I WAS THINKING OF–
MAYBE I WOULD CUT DOWN MY HOURS ONCE I GET THINGS UP TO SPEED, ‘CAUSE I HAVE
A NUMBER OF DIFFERENT– – WELL,
YOU’RE REVIEWING QUITTING. VIEWERS NEED THIS.
– YEAH. – AMERICA NEEDS THIS,
AND THE WORLD NEEDS THIS. – SIX MINUTES UNTIL THE PASTRIES
ARRIVE, MR. FORREST. – DO WE UNDERSTAND EACH OTHER
OR WHAT? – [sighs] – FORREST, GET OUT HERE.
I WANT TO SHOW YOU SOMETHING. TAKE A LOOK AT THIS.
“LOBBY JAVA BY FORREST.” – UH, WILLY… I’M REALLY SORRY. UH…
[clears throat] YOU KNOW,
WHEN I FIRST STARTED HERE, I BELIEVED IN WHAT
WE WERE DOING. NOW I’M NOT SO SURE. – WHAT? – BUT THERE IS, UH,
ONE THING I KNOW. YOU’RE THE BIGGEST JAG-OFF
I’VE EVER WORKED FOR. – FORREST…
– AND I HOPE THIS PLACE– UGH– BURNS TO THE GROUND
WITH YOU IN IT, BECAUSE THAT IS EXACTLY
WHAT YOU DESERVE, YOU NICKEL-AND-DIME
CHICKEN[bleep] MOTHER[bleep]. OH, BOY. YOU CALL YOURSELF A MANAGER? YOU COULDN’T MANAGE
A HAM SANDWICH! [clears throat]
OKAY, I AM LEAVING HERE, AND I AM NEVER COMING BACK, NOT IF YOU BEG ME! WHO’S WITH ME? – I AM!
– OH. – IF MR. FORREST GOES, I GO! – OH, GOD. – YOU COULDN’T MANAGE
A HAM SANDWICH!

100 thoughts on “Review – Lobby Java by Forrest”

  1. In order to benefit the world, he ruins his entire life, maybe it would be beneficial to everyone if he just stopped? Forrest>Jesus. Just saying.

  2. Seriously I hope you actually apologized off cam, that poor man is probably gonna have a heart attack and die now! What is wrong with you?

  3. "You're the biggest jag off i've ever worked for."    "Forest……."                                  It's so sad!!!

  4. The whole joke is that the guy is like the nicest man on the face of the earth and Forrest really didn't need to have a big dramatic FU speech while quitting but I like to imagine his producer wrote that for him to read for the camera to seal the deal 100% but Forrest's morals can be questionable from time to time so maybe he did just go a little overboard even if he didn't want to.

  5. I know this is fake. Its a show within a show. But still… Fucked up. Horrible idea. I came to laugh. Not feel bad. Fucked up. Really fucked up. Fuck you comedy central.

  6. Yeah Forrest had to do awful stuff like this for the sake of his show.  Review is great.  Highly recommend the pancakes episode.

  7. Donnie The Don Lesser

    The idea of this is funny as hell but actually watching it is soo painful.. This is worse than the "Review" where he had to divorce his wife, pure agony hahah that poor old man.

  8. Fabrizio Pignataro

    This is waaaaaaaaay better than Key and Peele! This touch my feeling because the acting is perfect even I feel bad for that old man

  9. imrickjamesbeeoch

    1:20 "you're the biggest jag-off I've ever worked for"

    "Forrest…?"

    jeez, the sound of disappointment in his voice

  10. I'm confused, this is amazing, yet no context, feels like I'm missing scenes? Is this a series or something? How can I watch this

  11. im not a complete pussy, therefore i found this scripted comedy funny, and didnt feel sorry for any of the actors. Again, because im not a giant pussy.

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